It's the little things I miss the most...

I hate to go
But I can’t stay
Stuck between worlds
A life almost complete
Bittersweet like lemonade
It’s the little things you miss the most
A hug on a rainy day
A joke no one else gets
Off on my own, until I return
And I remember why
I never want to leave...


I really couldn't sleep tonight. Due to an allergic reaction I had to sleep all day and give in to the wonders of "medication".


Here I am trying to write a good entry for this sleepless night.


What Do I miss the Most?


I miss not being able to worry about anything.


I miss a lover's embrace. (I have been afraid to be in a relationship since I never knew what true love is...)


I miss kissing.


I miss making love all day/night long, of course this wont ever happen.


I miss being able to fully relax and not think. My thoughts are way ahead of me most of these days.


I miss connecting with someone and yet again it would be nearly impossible to do so since I'm always taken for granted.


(and of course the whole topic would shift to another one)


I like to be able to meet someone who would be easy to get along with, to possibly have a relationship that doesn't require much... such as there's understanding, compassion, passion, fun and excitement and the required responsibilities that follows.


I'm afraid that certain fire had left me, thus making me feel unwanted. 


I came to know my fear... 


I fear to be alone. BUT I never wanted to be needy and demanding... or to suffocate someone. 


One night stands and those pesky relationship blunders doesn't appeal to me, it never did. I really wish I could meet someone and get to know him with all his complexities and wonder and he would get to know me too... 


I am made to believe that relationships wont last. 


What I really want out of life right now is to:


*Have a career that I would enjoy doing until I grow old.
*Have a house and a car that I could afford by myself.
*A dog that would keep me company.
* A guy that would adore me for what I am and what I can offer, as I will do to him.


Honestly, I don't believe in marriage until we both know we can both be contented with each other... After all, the world is drastically changing with not enough satisfaction to fill you up...


But I must say, If I could have a guy at this moment in time... I would be as happy and contented as to have him in my life.